Monday, June 18, 2012

what a tangled Webb we weave

Just a quick post-US Open round-up:

The eventual winner, Webb Simpson, in addition to being a dead ringer for Owen Wilson, provides an unprecedented second consecutive example (after Bubba Watson at the Masters) of a major winner being a namesake of an earlier winner of the same major championship, the earlier winner in this case being Scott Simpson in 1987. Interestingly, both Simpsons won their championships at the same course. This isn't unprecedented, as a lot of the various Morrises and Parks in the early days of the Open Championship won their titles on the same course (Prestwick, mostly), and of course Bubba Watson and Tom Watson won their Green Jackets on the same course, though that doesn't really count since the Masters is played on the same course every year.

Simpson also provides a second consecutive example of a major championship winner being a tedious God-botherer - I can't find any video clips of his full winner's speech (though there are several of the moment when he got interrupted by some drunk bloke in a Union Jack hat) but this article provides a couple of quotes, notably this one:
I probably prayed more on the last three holes than I've ever done in my life, and that kept me calm and got me home in 2 under.
So God, in additon to all that prurient spying on people wanking, takes a personal interest in the outcome of golf tournaments, and indeed personally intervenes in their outcome, though always sufficiently subtly to be undetectable - the ball being borne aloft on a little silver cloud by a choir of warbling cherubim and moved in a mysterious way to the hole while the clouds part and a big booming voice intones YOU DA MAN, WEBB would be a bit of a giveaway, presumably. But what if Webb and Bubba came up against each other in a play-off? Or would it be more of a pray-off? Eh? Eh? How would God know who to help out? Whoever had done the least wanking that week, I suppose.

Anyway, Simpson's Goddy tendencies are well-known - he's got a freakin' degree in religion, for goodness' sake - and the UK media's reaction to this provides an interesting contrast with the US one. Check out BBC commentator Andrew Cotter's tweet in the immediate aftermath of the win:

Now I think that's pretty funny, but that level of flippancy and irreverence from a professional journalist in relation to religion simply wouldn't fly in the US, an attitude of uncritical reverence to nonsensical voodoo bullshit being pretty much compulsory.

Note that the USA Today article I linked to earlier contains some textbook use of the word "clutch" in its usual golfing context as well.

No comments: