This is what Bill Oddie ought to be doing, not
fannying about by a lake with
Kate Humble. Not that I'd be averse to a bit of fannying about by a lake with.....well, you get the idea. I think it's the "sensible outdoor science-y types in practical shoes and a fleecy
gilet" thing that does it. I always had a bit of a thing for
Kathy Sykes as well. And (like
Dr. Alice Roberts) she's based in Bristol, which does make the whole stalking thing a lot less problematic.

Well, I seem to have wandered a bit, so back to more serious cephalopodic matters. Firstly, Father's Day is coming up, and you'll be wanting to get something nice for Dad. So how about one of
these? I think technically it's a cuttlefish rather than a squid, and their brains don't really look like that, but the eyes have a nice baleful krakenesque look about them. Plus, when our squishy-bodied overlords slurp forth from the abyss and claim their rightful place on dry land with all of humanity as their slaves, you can flash the tie at them and they might treat you a bit more kindly.
And it could be any day now, judging by the shocking footage in this clip from
The Colbert Report:
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